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[20 Dec 2009|06:46am] |
39 weeks. This little guy is determinied to stay put FOREVER. Every day he is in there, the stretch marks gets worse and worse damnit! I've been 2cm dilated for a few weeks now so hopefully we have some progress @ this next appointment. My cervix wont efface & the baby wont drop... the doctor fears he isnt "dropping" because he doesnt fit into my pelvis. If he hasnt decended this week - we have to start talking c section =/. I'm pretty bummed... hoping little hamilton makes his appearance before christmas. I want to hold him so bad...
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(just a earth bound misfit)
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[20 Nov 2009|10:23pm] |
35 weeks
It hurts to move now. =/ I hope to make it to at least 38 weeks... Then if he wants to venture his way out.. I wont be mad! hahha. I will be getting induced if all goes well on the 18th (39 weeks). So I now have about 3 1/2 weeks left. I'm so excited to meet my little man. It feels like my life is just beggining. I finally washed the babies clothing/blankets yesterday and disinfected all his bottles and play mats/swing ect. I still need to put everything away although I did begin to do it at least. My step daughter will be here in a few days and we have her until the beginning of Dec. When she leaves, i'll go ahead and finish doing everything. I cant wait to kiss her. Its been about a month 1/2 since weve seen her and it's killing me and daddy. Other than that... all is good. <3 love you guys.
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(4 tounge tied and twisted s | just a earth bound misfit)
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| crying ... |
[04 Sep 2009|01:23am] |
like a little fuckign baby over my little brother. UGH! I am so annoyed wiht him. We already have no relationship what so ever now because he recently lost his mind along with his virginity!!! About 10 months ago He started dating this little girl whom completely ruined his life. He dropped out of school for her, quit his job, lost all his friends, and completely changed as a person to satisfy her. He is not even the same person that i've known my whole life... its crazy I've never seen any one this attached and obsessed with anyone. ALmost the entire family has written him off already
About February this year... him and Paulie got into a fight over me because my little brother kept calling me "bitch, cunt ect...and just doing and saying mean stuff to me......so anyways it ended bad! my little brother tried hitting paul wiht his truck repeatedly.... then paul punched the side of his door and tried ripping him out of the truck becuase dylan was billigerant and drunk. It was out of control. Anyway when he hit the truck it dented the door... and it cracked the paint in the dent.... paul, the next day when they had made up & sobered up, offered to pay for half a new paint job, $600, seeing as it was both their faults. Dylan freaked out saying how we needed to pay for all of it and how paul "shouldnt have been in the road and mouhing off blah blah blah, and he wouldnt have tried to hit him with the truck" So now....7 months down the line, when we have a baby due in 3 months... he wants 600 dollars I told him absolutely not right now, he shold have taken the money when we had it and were offering it. I told him he would get it on my time. And I wouldnt pay him I would pay my mom whom does all the up-keep on the truck, payed for most the truck, and pays the insurance on it still & supplys him with gas money daily.
So now im getting threatning text messages stating " you'll pay you dumb cunt you just wait and see whats coming to you" blahblah blah. He had made my whoel pregnancy miserable. He just wont stop. HE says the meanest shit about how the baby will probably have disablitites and shit since its "pauls genes". It's jsut insane and over whelming. AND he keeps threatning my truck and shuff?.... I think I should buy a camera so his little ass doesnt come cut my break lines or bust all my windows out. WHY is he going so crazy this year
Im so bad at the situaltion because it's my baby brother and he's never acted this way before. I dont want to completely not have him im ny life where he thinks i would give up on him but i jsut want to so bad... im sad =[ I dont even get to see him. He isnt even invited to my baby shower... how awful is that?
WTF am I supposed to do UGH! Now i stopped cryingbecause i'm mad again. Thank god hahaha. Thanks LJ HELP!
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(9 tounge tied and twisted s | just a earth bound misfit)
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[03 Aug 2009|03:03pm] |
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MY LITTLE HAMMY!!!
Paul Hamilton Cottrell VI
All blood results came back as negatives...
I feel like the most honored human being on the planet.
Winkie!
look at that chunkey little face already!
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(2 tounge tied and twisted s | just a earth bound misfit)
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| well goodmorning |
[25 Jul 2009|02:44pm] |
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braxton hicks contractions..
This whole week theyve been tightening my whole lower belly..... so much yesterday that i think it scared the baby hhah..... he/she dropped down into my pelvis and caused momma pain all day! I think he/she was hidding from the crazy contractions. I wonder if it's because of my insanely high sex drive. It seems like when im horny, which is always, is when it's happening the most..... or if i have to pee.... or if i'm walking too much, ect. hahahh. I guess it usually doesnt start until late 3rd trimester so i'll have to ask the doc if it's normal... or maybe all you mamas out there can help me out!
I cant wait to go to the doctors next week!!!! So Dr. Kelley can telling me that my baby is perfect and healthy.... UGH. I worry WAY too much. Hopefully the doctor wont be squeezing colostrum out of my nipples this time OWCH!!!. He says i'll probably be blessed in the milk department seeing as i've had colostrum since about 8 weeks pregnant and my momma still has milk to this day!!
Anyways... PAulie is in Colorado... and I had to sleep without him last night.... he should be driving back in a few hours. Can't wait to kiss him! my cousin leaves in two days =[ I want her to stay with me forever...
Love ya'll
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(4 tounge tied and twisted s | just a earth bound misfit)
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[23 Jul 2009|09:16am] |
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11 more days until my next appointment! I wish it was the 3rd already!!! Why cant't i be pregnant 9 weeks? I'm ready to meet the baby already.... and ready to be able to sleep on my tummy again too hahahha. My nipples have had colostrum coming out of them for the past two months... however I bought three B cups and one C cup yesterday muahahha! Also, some strechy capri things... no pants fit!
court for astrid september 3rd... lets pray for a good response. hearing her voice on the phone last week made me tear up.... were im missing her pretty bad at this point. cant wait to kiss her little face and decorate her & the babys room in next month or two!!!
<3 going to go lay with my paulie and sit on hold with unemployment.... 31:19
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(4 tounge tied and twisted s | just a earth bound misfit)
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[09 Jul 2009|12:43pm] |
We find out the sex in 3 weeks!! We could have found out a few weeks ago however i'm trying to practice patience, since i'll be needing it soon! hahaha.
I'll keep you guys updated!!!!
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(2 tounge tied and twisted s | just a earth bound misfit)
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[10 Jun 2009|06:41pm] |
The first real ultra sound!!!! I am 12 weeks and due on Christmas Day! My little Jesus baby <3!!! I feel so blessed. I cried hysterically when I heard the heart beat, it was the greatest thing. I wish I could just listen to is constantly!.... The rest of the ultra sound was fun though! we watched the baby in 4D going crazy it looked like I ate straight sugar hahahah. It was kicking in the air so high that we couldnt get a clear picture for like 30 minutes till the baby calmed down hahahah.
Today is wonderful.
Paulie layed on my belly last night till I fell asleep haha. He is so sweet. I love him. And I love the baby already so much, what a incredible experience!
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(6 tounge tied and twisted s | just a earth bound misfit)
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[19 May 2009|02:24pm] |
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We just got back last night to Colorado, we leave in two days to go visit Astrid, then again in a week 1/2 to A vegas for my jury duty!!!! Jeeez.. I just want to be home for a few days damnit!! It felt so incredible sleeping in my own bed for once haha. I cant wait to see astird... she is talking so well on the phone now... I can't wait to kiss that face!! Kirsten found out that i'm pregnant... I was hoping to tell her when we went down there but whatever. Astrid will be 4 when the baby is born!
I'm jsut about 8 weeks now!! That means the baby is starting to look alien-like instead of just a little blob! hahah! It's insane how quickly they start to develop in the belly. 100,000 brain cells per minute are developing in my babys brain right now!!!!! I don't get too sick, and I still havent thrown up yet however, i'm starting to feel a little sick if I don't eat or if i'm around something that has too strong of a smell.. I don't feel moody or insane yet either - although i'm sure it will come! I started a journal for the baby to read later on.... just stating emotions i'm feeling daily, how Paul feels and copys of the ultra sounds and what not... I think it will be a nice reminder of my journey through this experience. I love when Paulie kisses me and touches the belly haha... I havent gained anymore weight in the second month, just the 15 lbs from the first month. Also, i'm allregic to vitamins especally the prenatal or one-a-days!!... I started taking ONLY iron ( which I know I can take ) and folic acid today... if it gives me hives like usual, i'll stick to a healthy diet I suppose. I'm allergoc to everything damnit!
COLORADO IS SOOO BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!! It's so green and smells like fresh flowers everwhere you go. It's so refreshing. We'll be moving back to Vegas in November so I can be near my mom and both of our families when the baby is born. I'm so sad to be going back but luckily it is just temporary...
MY BIRTHDAY IS IN 12 DAYS!!!!!!!!!
Only thing going wrong right now - Ashton won's answer my calls.... =[ ASH?!!!!!!!!
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(2 tounge tied and twisted s | just a earth bound misfit)
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| I HAD |
[08 May 2009|01:45am] |
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MY FIRST ULTRASOUND TODAY =]
SIX weeks preggo!!!!
I went to planned parenthood because my insurance doesnt start until next week and i'll be back in Colorado by then!! They couldnt tell me much... just how far along I am and show me pictures. Which i've been staring at all day.. hahah.
I'll have to drive to Vegas once a month for the doctors appointments..... I'm tyring not to get too excited until i can see the OBGYN to tell me we're both healthy! hahah. It's not working, I'm crawling out of my skin in excitment. My baby is 2.15 Cm long!!! hahahha. Some how, I've gained 12 lbs, though!? 'It's" a little fatty!!
WOOOOOOOOO!!! My god is good to me!!
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(10 tounge tied and twisted s | just a earth bound misfit)
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| adam |
[20 Apr 2009|11:13pm] |
my heart hurts for my jenna, his friends and family. what a terrible thing to happen... It seems a little surreal. All I can hope is that god will heal the hurt in everyones heart and that he will be up there smillin down at all fo us.
pretty fucking bummed =[
Love ya adam. Always buddy.
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(just a earth bound misfit)
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[12 Apr 2009|08:29am] |
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'Jonathon Livingston Seagul' and 'Illusions' by Richard Bach are incredible short stores, I advise everyone to read them!!!!!
"The mark of your ignorance is the depth your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly"
The bottom of our hot water heater rusted out and flooded our room. The owner of our house hasnt changed it out since 1987, haha!! It smells terrible and has turned our carpets brown hahahha. We got a brand new one now though!! We will be sleeping in the living room or spare bed till anthony gets back home! Also, I spent my whole tax return attempting to fix my car. I've now replaced the alternator twice and battery a million times... something is draining the life out of my car and I can't find the issue. I did however, find out that it's made in mexico and that all of the parts from the engine are from a Chevy Malibu. radical!
I'm just blabbin now ... I understand that many people dont beleive in any sort of higher power and that's okay with me...to each their own, so please dont think that I think of you any different regardless of my personal beliefs. However, I just got home from my sunday service and I keep thinking about how people say that religion ruins everthing, it starts wars and ect.. I think that it's specific people that ruin things. Just like in any situation, some people get obsessed and take things to ridiculous levels that are completely unnececary. The people who believe that sacraficing and such with cure their sins, that's just insane to me.. However I suppose my christian beliefs are probably insane to alot of people too. I dont know, I've just had too much coffee - I'm wired. hahah. Anyway, I think jesus is wonderful for the things he has done for me personally, and Easter is a wonderful day to be spent with the ones you love. I wish I were closer to my family today so I could tell them how thankful I am for them. Paul and I will be eating some sort of pasta seeing as I dont want to ruin a perfectly good turkey, hahah! He is my angel.. my bestfriend, my everything. Everyday is paradise lately and I couldnt have asked for more. I cant wait for the weather to get hot here!!
"Our Father, who art in heaven,
Hallowed be thy Name.
Thy kingdom come.
Thy will be done,
On earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our trespasses,
As we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation,
But deliver us from evil.
For thine is the kingdom,
and the power, and the glory,
for ever and ever. "
I'm getting this prayer from 'the book of common prayer' tattooed on my entire back. Stoked.
me and mommy!
i like painting masks!
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(just a earth bound misfit)
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